Tanner Montague came to town from Seattle having never owned his own music venue before. He’s a musician himself, so he has a pretty good sense of good music, but he also wandered into a crowded music scene filled with concert venues large and small.But the owner of Green Room thinks he found a void in the market. It’s lacking, he says, in places serving between 200 and 500 people, a sweet spot he thinks could be a draw for both some national acts not quite big enough yet for arena gigs and local acts looking for a launching pad.“I felt that size would do well in the city to offer more options,” he says. “My goal was to A, bring another option for national acts but then, B, have a great spot for local bands to start.”Right or wrong, something seems to be working, he says. He’s got a full calendar of concerts booked out several months. How did he, as a newcomer to the market in an industry filled with competition, get the attention of the local concertgoer?
by Lola Fredrickson It’s a classic scenario. Your boss approves your participation in a professional association conference, say in San Francisco, but part of the deal is that you do lots of networking. Now it’s a quarter to five in the city on the bay, and you’re in your room trying to psyche yourself up for the cocktail/networking hour.
You start hoping you’ll pass out before you actually have to make contact with someone you don’t know. The dread is only compounded by that little voice in your head (not to mention your boss’s voice!) that says you should do this.
You’ve probably already realized that slogging through a packed hotel room handing out as many business cards as possible and making superfluous conversation doesn’t set one up for much success. There’s a better way.
As a business owner, I discovered years ago that the best and easiest kind of business was done with trusted friends. In fact, life is much easier if you have a wide network of associates to help you with all kinds of things. So I redefined my concept of networking to that of building and maintaining long-term friendships, concentrating my time on a smaller number of people that I sincerely liked.
Why networking matters This is important since most of us will be working for decades, and every individual you add to your network can potentially be a lasting friend through many jobs and changes in your life. In the current job market, for example, people are rarely in jobs indefinitely, and we all know someone who has lost a job. The best way to find another is to have a network of professional friends you can call on. Sadly, many people wait to build a network until there’s a crisis.
If you have a small business, your network will serve as the best way to sell your product or service as well as many other functions — locating a mortgage banker, hairdresser or doctor or determining what nonprofit efforts you might enjoy. The list is really endless. Most friends play a specific role in your life, but they all count, and the roles may change over time.
My friend Jane Winston is such an example. Back in the 1980s I met Jane at one of the Carlson School of Business’ Executive Education programs (a great networking opportunity). There were about 60 business
people in the group and, though I socialized with several of them, I made a lasting friendship with Jane. During the past two decades, she’s had jobs with three different organizations, and I’ve met people from all those organizations through her. Some of those people have been business contacts and some are now friends. All of them are part of my personal network.
Because Jane and I make a point of keeping in touch with each other on a regular basis, the value I have received from this relationship is extremely high, and I’m confident that she feels the same.
Where can I meet people? You can meet people anywhere, from your Weight Watchers class or your dog training session, to more typical business venues. However, just as you want to focus on people you like, also focus on activities you enjoy. If you are new to the community or just getting connected for the first time, check out nonprofit groups, the Rotary clubs, local chambers of commerce, professional associations and the like.
Once you’ve found an enjoyable meeting place, focus on conversation.
“The art of networking is all in the conversation between two people,” says Janel Goff of the Goff Investment Group in the Twin Cities and an outstanding networker in her own right.
“Networking is not selling to the other person, it’s learning more about them…. Listen closely and share your passions.” Surprisingly, many professional people report that it’s difficult for them to have a conversation with a stranger when there’s no established bond.
The steps below will get you started, but for some outstanding guidance on conversation, you can’t beat the old standard by Dale Carnegie, How to Win Friends and Influence People.
1. Listen to people when you’re having a conversation. Don’t focus on what you are going to say or your opinion of what’s being discussed. Rather, ask more about what they say, repeat parts of their ideas that catch your attention, and ask for more information or clarification.
2. Relationships are similar to a bank account. You have to put something in before you can withdraw something. In your conversations, look for places where you can “make deposits.” Deposits can be contacts, suggestions, places to look for information to solve a problem, sharing a book or article or anything that shows an interest in helping someone with a need or interest of theirs.
3. Select only people that you like. Building relationships requires time. If you don’t like someone, it won’t be fun so you won’t follow through.
4. Take your lead in conversation from what you hear. You really don’t need to talk much if you feel shy about doing so. In fact, when folks say they have an excellent conversation with someone, it’s usually because the other person did a lot of listening. However, always be armed with some good questions.
5. Good relationships cross lines. One day a client may become a friend or a colleague can become a business partner or a source of a job contact for another friend. There is tremendous connectedness among all of us. Don’t put anyone into one slot and leave him or her there. Look for the opportunity to invite your classmate or coworker to a theater event or potluck — something you haven’t done before. That helps her increase her network as well.
Once you’ve made a new friend, treat it like a precious jewel that can add light and value to your life — and remember to pass on those gifts to your friends as well. In the end, friends add spice and meaning to life, helping to ease the difficult patches along the way. How can that be work?
